The Hollywood Weight Debate and the Ridiculous Societal Standards That Come From It

So I’m sure, like many other people, I stayed up last night to watch the Oscars. I love to look at what people are wearing because I’m really into fashion. Overall, I enjoyed the Oscars and there wasn’t really anything that anyone wore that I found too appalling. I admit, I was up and down during the show doing other things, so I certainly could have missed something crazy!
Anyway, then today I was on Facebook and I saw a post from E News showing a split screen picture of Jennifer Lawrence in her Oscar dress and her Oscar after-dress. This caused me some distress so I took to my Facebook status, reposted the picture, and ranted a bit. An old friend from high school, a male, felt the need to comment on what I wrote, which of course, I was compelled to reply to.

Jennifer

Here is the transcript of what transpired:

MY ORIGINAL POST:
I have nothing against Jennifer Lawrence, she is a very talented actress, but the fact that there have been all these articles recently about how she is “a real woman with curves” and doesn’t fit Hollywood’s standards of beauty and skinny is a friggin’ joke! That girl has not a curve anywhere on her body and to think these photos show “a real woman’s body” is a complete joke! And they can’t blame it on Spanx either because she’s not even wearing underwear in the second dress!


ROB:
I’m sorry {my name} but a woman does not have to be chubby and out of shape to be a “Real” woman! Her industry demands that she stay in shape much like a professional athlete needs to be in top physical condition to maintain his/her career. She is actually very average as far as body mass. She is thicker then most celebrity women. She is also 23. Sorry but I hate hearing that people who take care of their bodies, are in the public eye, get ridiculed for it. I’m 25 lbs. overweight and do you think for a minute and say to myself, damn I better look like George Clooney or Brad Pitt! Not at all. And don’t say it is different for women then it is men because that is B.S. You allow yourself to create an image of what you feel you should look like to others. You were always a beautiful girl and I am sure a beautiful now. Be happy with you!


MY RESPONSE:
I never said I wasn’t happy with myself, nor did I criticize anyone for taking care of their body! I’m not chubby or out of shape and I wasn’t implying that a real woman has to be overweight to be “real.” By the looks of these photos and what I saw live last night, here is nothing “thick” about her! Nor do her legs look anything like what they did in the recent photos I am referring to. There is also a HUGE difference between taking care of your body and basically starving yourself and exercising yourself to the point that you look almost starved like many Hollywood women do. I haven’t created any image of what I feel I should look like to others. I don’t want to look like her or other Hollywood women. She looks starved and I don’t find that appealing at all, nor do I find being overweight appealing. Could I stand to lose a few pounds? Sure! Do I really give a shit? Nope (as I sit here and type on my iPad while drinking wine and eating Thai food)!
My point in this post is that it’s all a bunch of bullshit! She doesn’t look anything like she did in that photo of her in the one piece bathing suit type thing that I saw in a magazine. So it is very clear, at least to me, that she succumbed to the same bullshit she pretended to be against. She obviously dieted and worked out to get in “better shape.” And you know what? Good for her! She’s a beautiful young woman. She’s 23 so why not be skinny before her body naturally starts to age, but don’t pretend to be against all the Hollywood weight hype and then fall prey to it so easily. It just makes her lose credibility- at least in my book.

ROB:

Wine and Thai,….sounds like a good evening.

MY RESPONSE:

Just as a reference, this is the photo I’m talking about. I think she looks amazing in this photo, but this is not the same body in the photo above!

Jennifer Lawrence bathing suit photo

The standards of what society sets as beautiful and acceptable all have to do with weight. If you’re anything more than a 0 or 2, you are clearly a fat cow. You better cut out all carbs, meat, dairy, blah, blah, blah- basically anything that tastes good. You better sell your soul to the devil for a lifetime gym membership and a personal trainer or you ain’t worth shit!

Clearly, I do not fit into those standards. I have not been a 0 or a 2 since high school and I have accepted that I never will be again.

  • Am I fat? Not at all.
  • Could I lose a few pounds and be in better shape? Absolutely.
  • Do I eat healthy? Much of the time I do.
  • Do I deny myself the things I want to eat or drink? Nope.
  • Do I have a gym membership? Nope, again.
  • Do I work out outside of a gym? Nope for the third time! I have 2 little boys that I run after constantly so that’s enough of a work out for me!
  • Am I lazy? Not at all. I just choose, right now, to not make the time to work out because I have a lot of other things going on in my life that I feel are more important.

And that last statement I just made pretty much sums it up. I don’t put that much importance on being super skinny. I never have. I admit that there were times in my life when I put more importance on it, but it has never been even in my top 5 most important things.
I guess I’m lucky that I’ve always been naturally on the more fit side. Never “skinny,” but certainly thin and muscular. That’s just my genetics. I have never starved myself or worked out like a mad woman. I have never even dieted really. I followed Weight Watchers once when my sister was doing it and I lost about 15 pounds that I definitely needed to lose. But I lost that weight to be healthy and feel better, not to be more accepted by societal standards.

 
I’m fairly comfortable in my own skin. Hell, I rocked a bikini during both of my pregnancies! But, are there days when I look at myself in the mirror in disgust? Hell yes there are! Do I wish my boobs were bigger and my stomach flatter? Of course I do! I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t. Then I have to take a step back and remember that this body of mine birthed 2 amazing little boys and nursed both of them for 14 months. And I don’t have a private chef or a personal trainer. I also have to remember that most of those people who kill themselves to be skinny are doing so to mask a very deep pain and they think looking a certain way will make that pain go away. But it doesn’t. Those people are the ones who are wearing 00 pants and xxs tops and still looking in the mirror and hating what they see. I may look in the mirror and hate what I see sometimes, but I only hate what I see on the surface, some people actually hate themselves inside and out and losing those last 5lbs. won’t change that.

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